Month: September 2021

Early morning rising

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Sleep is good but thank God I got something fun to do today. So I’m up and ready to go.

This didn’t used to be the case.

Mellow and blue were my days before in youth of my summer days.

Easy. Contented. Sitting down at my writing space and recording my thoughts and stories were my days of childhood enjoyment.

Do I miss those days?

No.

I am present for today making quick use of my time and my writing is not as crappy as it used to be in those childhood days long sense passed me by.

I blog in my between hours. I dream of November’s kiss. I have plans for future not yet present.

Brainstorming. Storytelling. Novel writing?!….

Real talk. I’m half and half on novel writing at present. Yesterday it was 60,000 words now it’s news to me that it’s now up to 75,000 to 100,000 words.

Now if you write a lot getting to 200,000 words is easier then you think. But, still not every novel is worth the extention of a short story over bloated with more shit (adjectives) in pot then flavor (plot) and seasoning (interesting characters).

Warm Regards,

How to be comfortable looking like a dumbass when your learning something new.

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I’m learning a new skill at my day job. There are certain risks in it and current moments I just feel like a dumbass for moments doing something wrong and then I shake it off.

Why?

I’ve spent two to three years learning new skills and feeling like a dumbass half of the time. I’m an old fuck but still I have the same uncomfortable moments when I’m learning something new.

Before, it was a headache and I got the shits half the time from self-esteem bullshit and fear. Now. I don’t give a fuck.

I learned that it’s okay to look like a dumbass learning and making mistakes in the beginning. It’s okay to be a little careful and to ease your way into getting into the groove of a skill.

My groove sets in when I’ve had a couple of months in the shit. I am a slow learner. But, generally when I learn something I take it to heart and I make it my own as natural to me as walking.

Humility goes a long way for other people being understanding toward you in the beginning. It also helps to give yourself a break and time to understand and master the elements of how a skill works in the sum of it’s parts to get the best results from it.

I give 110 percent commitment and honest effort in work and learning a skill. I don’t want to stay the same because everything I have ever started I was interested in I was shit at it from the jump. But, I never stayed being shit. I kept at it and I get better or I move on to something else.

Generally speaking in learning a particular skill set. Perfect practice is a rule I learned in college. There is practice doing things the wrong way and mastering the wrong way and there is perfect practice doing a skill set the right way and mastering doing things the right way.

I’m willing to look foolish, and make basic mistakes and be corrected and helped into doing things the right way. I’m unwilling not to put my best effort into becoming better or more skilled at what I do.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

Leveling up….updates.

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Everywhere around me people are leveling up and I’m one of them.

I’ve taken on a new challenge. Hot damn! It was everything I thought it would and better.

It was a long wait but hot damn! Alive. It was a experience.

My hands. Their rougher then they were seven years ago. Body is tougher then it was ten years ago. Tomorrow will bring what it will. Today is enough. Today I live in present pleasant challenges and the joy of achieving minor goals.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

P. S.

I’m making more money too.

Alright you’ve had your Red rage now it’s time to own your destiny…

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I acknowledge the lies told to me by the culture I was raised in and the females that feed and clothed me. I acknowledge the dirty things done to me and who did it to me.

Now with that said. I push on.

Every man is responsible for his destiny.

The moment an adult female or a another man acknowledges a boy has become a man there is no going back.

As a man I am personally responsible for what I do and for what I allow people to do to me.

Being a man has nothing to do with how developed my brain is or what age I am. It’s a rite of passage.

The rite of passage is the passage out of childhood into manhood and the way back is burned away.

When a boy takes the rite of passage. He goes through a passage from being protected and cared for to owning his course in life and taking responsibility for his actions, his words and his own personal space and image.

It’s when I don’t look to somebody to give me something. It begins when I earn my pay, my respect and don’t allow any female of any age or asshole of any size to take back my manhood so that I can acknowledge respect them.

I was born in a time when the victimized male is a normal part of my society. I’ve been victimized myself as a boy and a adult. But, as a man…..

As a man. I brush it off. As a man I push on. My body was made to endure. I don’t live in the past I exist in the present. The history of men is that of men having to push themselves. Of men having to endure and struggle to achieve their goals.

Some died in wars. Some came home wounded and scared. Some lost the ability to use one half their bodies from a stroke but we endure or we die.

We wear our struggles like jackets or badages of our passages of manhood. The men we respect are the men that lose their leg from car accident and go to work six months or two weeks later because they have a family to feed.

The history of a man is the endurance and struggle to survive and to conquer our domain. We do not give into fear or the nightmares of our past. We acknowledge the past and examine it and get treatment or talk to a therapist but we can’t live it.

A man. A man lives in the present of his manhood and not in the memories of his boyhood.

In conclusion, I will leave with a quote I read as a child and remembered and understand now as a man.

“When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.” – 1 Corinthians 13:11

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

Oktoberfest – the season for beer….in the fall?

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Short post. It’s just weird to me. I think of beer and I invision a stacked bare chest blond 20 something pouring two full giant sized beer mugs on her chest on a sunny naked beach in paradise.

Shouldn’t the season for beer be in the summer? Hmmm….

Then again this is Texas. Summer lasts longer here it seems. It’s supposed to be fall that’s bullshit in shit kicking Texas. Straight up.

I always wanted to try irish coffee. Every other form of alcohol smells like mutated monster balls piss and makes me want to throw up.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

I really need to dive deep into cyberpunk dreams….

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The stories write themselves for cyberpunk world. I have ideas swimming in my head. Though I still haven’t even explored the whole nomad badlands side yet.

I’m thinking of writing a book soon or later next…. wait a minute. I could do it for November’s kiss. I just want to write a nice short story for it though as a side project.

I still have a vague memory of reading through

Do Android’s dream of electric sheep.

The concept and the feel of the book is banana balls to me but Philip K. Dick made that shit feel so lived in and down and dirty real.

Honestily I haven’t really did a deep dive into his shit but the occasional story I’ve dived into cyberpunk shit always pulled me in.

Paycheck. Man that book. I liked how Dick led with the charecter and gave the reader bits and glimpses into the world that the charecter lives in without making the world the focus.

I got to get a collection of Dick’s stories when that shit was hot. I want to explore his thought process to pull out more ideas unexplored for my cyberpunk world.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

Cyberpunk dreams: Fixer’s vacation

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The Fixer on vacation….

Owen

“Sigma? What the hell are you doing here?” Miss James said as I heard her come out of the building.

I looked up from my detapad and put it away as Miss James dressed in a plain looking silver blue suit cut to her form. Her jacket was open to show her silver blouse that hugged her breasts nicely. She came out of the restaurant from her business Brunch meeting. Her bodyguards, asistent and partners all stood at attention at her sides blocking the crowd from coming close to her.

She was a modern day royal in a neo silver city and she belonged to me. Well…not in the modern legal way but in the nomad culture way.

“Congratulations. I have an hour of vacation time. You want to go on a ride around the city before you next meeting?” I asked her.

Miss James gave me a sardonic smile. “You heard about my pregnancy?”

I stared at her. “No. You just hit 6.1 Billion ebs this morning.”

Miss James froze and then quickly looked at her deta pad. She stared at it and then calmly put her detapad away. There was giddiness in her eyes now. She held up her head higher and thrust out her chest on display. She walked toward me swaying her hips. She looked behind me at the transporters lining the corner.

“Which one?”

I pointed at the bike directly behind me. “Sense your carrying an investment in futures. Maybe a bike ride wouldn’t be wise.”

Miss James waved me aside as she stared at the silver blue cyber blade bike.

Her silver blue painted nails traced the name of the cycle on the base of the cycle on the side.

“E. James. Cute. ” Miss said sounded more bored then impressed.

I shook my head. “It’s the name of the company that makes the bikes.” I said.

Her head snapped up and she met my gaze. “You bought a cycle company for me?”

I shook my head. “No. I invested funds in a cycle company as an executive over a trust.” I said.

Miss James stared at me. “I do not need your financial protection.”

I snorted. “Aw. I never said you did. The trust again is for the person inside you not you. You don’t get a dime.” I said.

Miss James stared at me. “When are you going to stop hustling in the streets and come up to my level and stop hidding your wealth?”

I held up a finger. “1. I have a wife worth 6.1 ebs.” I paused and held up another finger before she can speak. “2. Being public rich only has it’s uses for normals. I’m a private service provider. My value is dependent on my reputation and my network of customers. I’m always working and I didn’t come looking for you. People like yourself come to me.”

Miss James stared at me. “I am not pregnant by the way. I wanted to test you. I can’t figure you out just yet or what is between us. It seems to reasonable, all business and detached but you keep looking at my breasts and legs and you seem strangely available in your schedule to fufill your marriage responsibilities in bed when I call. So I’m confused.”

I grinned. “So you want to take a ride or waste time bullshiting? We have seventy minutes and twelve seconds left.” I said and held out a helmet for her.

She took off heels and handed them to me taking the helmet. Her asistent Camy Vader came up to her helped but some boots on her feet. I put her shoes in my side saddle. I hopped on starting the engine and put on my helmet.

She hugged my waist as she leaned in behind me. I started the engine pushing the converge silver button. The bike started to raise she held on tighter.

“What’s going on? I don’t like heights.” Miss James said over the radio in the helmet.

“I’m just pulling it out of the space. We’re not taking the SkyWay. Trust me.” I said.

“I do.” Miss James admited.

I smiled and pulled the bike out on to the road once I found a break in traffic. It was still morning so traffic was light. I gave the bike a little more turbo and took off down the street.

“Wooo. HOLY SHIT!” Miss James screamed her excitment over the radio.

I smiled and just enjoyed the ride on my vacation time.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

Holy shit! I can’t believe the fuck?! Amber Rose and a simp in love?!

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Here’s the link.

You ever hear something that made you think…holy shit this beta bitch would take cocain lady of the night on the fucking corner if she smiled at him and think nothing of it she asked for his fucking soul as payment.

The heart and soul of the beta bitch is this…..he’s a target for the right hocker trying to turn a john for some spare cash. Holy shit.

I have never in my mother fucking life seen a beta bitch simp this fucking thrusty for any bitch even a bitch from the streets to smile at him and pat his crutch.

This fucker is….Holy shit.

This beta bitch simp said from his fucking mouth he would marry Amber Rose?! He thought Amber Rose was one of the top….fuck that noise…

I propose a riddle to you a conundrum if you will…

I see her value in her smile.

I see her value because a rich man fucks her.

I see her value when she’s on a pole or standing at a corner at 1 a.m. in red light district.

I see her and dream of all the happy days or married life with her.

I dream of the romantic dates we would go on. The happy days laughing in the rain.

Why won’t she please see me?

What am I…

on?

Cocain wet dreams or romantic cocain with baking soda. Pick your posion.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

P. S.

“

Lil Nas X is Pregnant with a serious case of shit.

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It creeps under the surface. You see the hint of it behind the masks of money and the pursuit of power.

Their fucked. Their all fucked by the creeping demon. The snake from before. The madness within.

It is the under control able un satisfied desire to turn beauty in to filth.

Nothing is safe. No innocence can exist for them. They are the buttom feeders. They are the children of the lie. They are the children who must burn away truth and feminine grace and the glow of natures truth.

There is no end to their madness. There is no end to their endless pursuit of the nothing…..

In English…

The shit made want to vomit. Damn it. Damn it all to hell and back but thank God….the shit still makes me sick.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

Let’s take Tango & Cash, Legend of Zelda and cyberpunk brainstorming…part 5

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Let’s put some Crocodile Dundee 2.

Dinner in the dungeon with a mobster….

Chapter 4

Tango

I woke up as I heard the laughter of Gannon in front of me. I lifted my head opening my eyes. Gannon sat in front of me with a female gurrudo at his side dressed in only a red two piece bathing suit and necklace around her neck.

I knew her. She was the chick that almost killed Cash a while back. She stood close Gannon almost like she was piece of his black suit.

Gannon studied my face and waved at the stack before me. It was cut up and spoon was set on the right side of the plate.

I picked up the spoon and started to eat. Gannon chuckled. “So trusting. I could have posioned it?”

I paused cewing down the meat before I spoke. “You don’t give a damn about me so long as I live long enough for you to get the tri scolls. What are you plans for Hyrule then?”

Gannon shrugged. “Out of my hands really. I don’t give a shit like I said. Once I get the scrolls I’m headed home but you’ll be to busy to worry about me or your departed father.” He said mentioning the fact he killed my father.

I sat the spoon down and sat back. “You know this plays out. We’ve been on this dance before. You always lose and I’m always standing over your sorry ass.” I said.

Gannon smiled widely showing his teeth. “Legends. Yes. I am awhere of the fate of our previous ancestors encounters. This time is different however. I don’t want you, this backwater kingdom or the scolls. I have profession. I’m a middle man.”

I looked between him and the female. Something was off about this whole deal. Yes. Sooner or later I would kill him for killing my father but something wasn’t right. This wasn’t how the fated story went.

“Is she your sister?” I waved to the female.

Gannon didn’t glance at the female. “No.”

Shit. This was all wrong. I didn’t trust any of it. Gannon didn’t have sex with females he was gay or at least an Asexual. It left me questioning everything to the moment my father was mudered. Hmm. Something wasn’t right about that either. It did happen but something wasn’t right about it.

I stared at him. “Who are you?”

Gannon smiled. “Hmm. Insightful. I’m sure you’ll realize it soon enough. But, I have a question. Why Cash?”

“What about Cash?” I asked.

Gannon sat back brushing his arm against the female. I heard her short in take of breath in pleasure and I saw her body stiffened for a moment. Then she relexed.

Gannon contined to stare at me ignoring her reaction to him.”Why are you two involved? He’s strong, loyal and dependable but he is beneath you. Why choose him?”

Gannon or whoever the hell he was full of shit. “The same reason you chose that female to your right. We are royalty. We can have what we want but he was born to be mean.”

Gannon didn’t smile but he nodded his head. “That will make things less complicated. Now I know Cash will do whatever he has to save you. Eat. Your stack is getting cold.”

To be continued….

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

P. S.

Holy shit.

Hot damn! I’m good.

Breaking my limiter….

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There’s this manga and anime called One-Punch man.

It’s leaps and bounds one of the best story and Super hero worlds I find so interesting.

What happens when a man becomes the strongest man alive alive after fighting millions of monsters and becomes un beatable? It should be a dead end story but it’s not. It’s about what do you do after that and how important human relationships are inspite of achievement.

But, the concept of the world is where I want to discuss for this blog post.

The world is all built around the concept of limts. Biological limits, psychological limitations and character limitations and the theory that once not always individuals who work the hardest, train the longest and grind their way through life’s battles can achieve moments when they break through their own limits.

Their called…heroes.

People that put in the work that have a set goal in their minds.

I think about my 20+ years of grinding at writing. I think of my hand hurting from long sessions of writing. I couldn’t stop writing either to see where the story was going or to escape into something else I could control.

I was shit warmed over when I started writing and I had no idea what the hell I was doing. But, slowly time consuming patience. I finally one day unknown to me at the time I broke through my first limiter and I’m still going.

If you feel like giving up the craft…wait a bit that sound you’ll hear afterwards or that funny as hell line you’ll write one day will be the sign…

You’ve broken past your own limitations.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

P. S.

What about the people that don’t put in the work? That coast by or try to find the easy way to achieve their success? Their willing to cheat. To kill. To eat anything to achieve their wish of fame or power.

Their called…monsters or villians.