Tag: dark comedy

The political theater: Trump vs the entire world! Episode ? Final season

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Ron Desantis is out and there are some candidates still….fuck all the bullshit it’s Trump vs His royal highness Joe Biden the commander and Chief of the Clown party Empire…

It is what it fucking is.

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The outcome at the end of the rainbow doesn’t matter at this point. The migrant invasion of over a million and above will be a interesting pot of gold everyone in America will be tasting for next hundred years but really we’ll probably see the immediate outcome by 2033.

Don’t get me wrong the U.S. currency is more of a immediate concern for me personally. The shift over into the new system is coming so I have to be ready for that.. I’m down for whatever. I’m a nine percent kind ah guy.

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This is my theory:

Fifty percent of Americans don’t give fuck because they’re eating their tv dinners and watching the news hoping for someone to put Trump under the jail. The forty percent are welcoming everybody in with open arms, love simp-pity and all that bullshit. The nine percent are prepared for whatever or have gotten the fuck out Tombstone before somebody says draw. America is divided on all fronts but when the Gunsmoke clears we’ll be here but hopefully all the assholes will be gone from passing themselves to death out of fear.

My predictions for the election. The fight to put Trump out will heat up even more come November. It’s a tush up who will pull the must tricks but hey in between all that we’re in the season of goble war War WARS!!!

Warm Regards

My thoughts on Guy stood up for Dinner…

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https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8L8J2Ps/

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I got only a few thoughts.

People ain’t shit.

That was my first thoughts. I heard of this video by way and saw influences making money off this dude and psycho analyzing the fuck out of him. Calling him a “nice guy” or “lame” some other fuck you language.

Come the fuck on.

The facts speak louder then words. Nobody gives a fuck about a man’s feeling. So why in the fuck should a dude give a fuck about what some chick’s thoughts about what the fuck she feels about him.

Fuck em!

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I’m not sorry at all. I got goals, I got a tight work schedule and a bag to chase. I have to find reasons to entertain a conversation with a chick some times when I know she ain’t shit but damn shorty got a nice ass.

The only advice I have for this dude is stop giving a full fuck about chick’s in general. Stop the extra shit. Stop giving a fuck about a fantasy happily ever after bullshit. If she about real shit and fucks with you from the jump enough fucking said.

But even then don’t give a fuck. For some reason this is attractive to females.

The question he asked in the video was why does it have to be this hard to find a chick to be in a relationship? Aka “finding your best friend that you want to fuck on a table.” The answer is simple.

People ain’t shit. They will tell you they ain’t shit. People will show you they ain’t shit. So believe em.

There are individuals in this world that make attempts to be about the truth, ya heard. But, we all have some level of bullshit. A dude has got to ask himself when he meets a chick,

alright where’s the bullshit at? The normal chick will hide her bullshit but all you got to do is let them talk and they’ll show you. Just pay attention.

Always ask the question. Is this chick even worth fucking with in order to endure her bullshit.

Final thoughts.

I don’t believe in romantic bullshit. I believe friendships with benefits or a normal sexual relationship.

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Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P.S.

Any female that stands me up or says I’m not interested in me fucking her is a female that is a kind hearted woman trying to save me from mountain size scale of her bullshit.

Massive UFO Disclosure and other shit….

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https://www.youtube.com/live/RwmLBQjy2o8?feature=share

Right now. Men in suits are saying a bunch of nothing but it is a nice distraction.

Granted I believe in UFOs and shit. Honestly. But what else is going on now?

Three interesting events.

1. The Russian Ukraine connection is still ongoing but is heating up to what end?! The Russian Hammer is about to come down.

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How do I know this? See the story above.

2. FedNow is here. Faster and instant cash transfer has brought the end of old way of money transfer waiting periods and the new age all digital. Currency as of now is not changing until such time in 50 years from now as Feds tell us it all happened around this time.

3. It is the year 2023, costs of living are rising. Everybody is slowly coming to the conclusion we’re in a recession or we’ve been in a recession or the simulation is breaking down and reality slapping the piss out of everyone.

Further updates to come when I get my 1911s

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Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Life coaching 101: Mindset

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The short hand: Life is 98% your reactions to the 10% of shit you never saw coming but life has a way of repeating patterns.

Mindset is important. There’s going to be shit that happens. There’s going to be problems you didn’t see happen and things you saw but ignored.

Accept when you were wrong and learn from your shit. Don’t repeat it unless you want to pretend your dumb and have a habit of drinking self pity with a side of jack Daniel’s.

Yes. You can control your proception to the output and input stimuli of people fucking with you.

It took me twenty plus years to finally take a laugh at myself and not give a fuck when I don’t have to give a fuck. I like control. I like being the master of my emotions and reactions. Accept reality but don’t get judgemental on yourself and others. We’re human.

What if I’m full of shit on this topic? Then spit out the bone and cew on the meat. Think on it.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Tales from the day job: Big D money

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I’m an old fuck. I’ve been working jobs sense I was 13 years old back in 1844. They called jobs back then slavery and hard labor. More things change the more they stay the same.

So I’ve worked around enough people to see every manner of tired and pissed off working kind of face on your average Joe American.

Big D Money is a fellow coworker I’ve worked around for three years now. Every damn day of the weak he comes to work and maintains a facial expression that is a twist between “are you fucking kidding” and “Here come this mother fucka again. I ain’t got time for this shit today.”

It’s a side Eye expression with a twist to his thin lips and utter disguest at people in general when they’re on some bullshit.

The fucking dude is the funniest mother fuck-ah around. When he does smile or chuckle it’s only because he’s telling a story about a time some asshole tried to go off on him one day then had to run to the restroom because they started passing themselves when he gave them the hard side Eye.

He has one of those faces that make you think he’s been forty-five years old for fifty-five years and still works seven days a week. His minor annoyance is at the higher ups begging him to consider being promoted sense he knows how to do everything better then everybody else.

Big D Money ain’t having it. A promotion for him means having to deal with more people’s bullshit.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Being an INFP sucks when someone is demanding you to give a fuck about a bullshit conversation.

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My internal world is often times the playground for all my ideas, dreams, strategies for staying ahead of bell curve of bordom.

Every INFP has a thing (Obession) we all busy ourselves with between now and dirt nap. Mean is writing with splash of music to uplift my mood on a bad day.

Big pet peeve when my energy is low I can be bothered to hold my fucking head up for fucking generic conversation. Paying attention is just not happening.

I know. I sound like a fucking asshole writing this shit. I accept this. Why? I can’t control it. It’s just me. My mind. The question. I can’t stand to hear it.

“You know Tina got a fat ass.”

I start counting. “Yeah. I know.”

“You want to hit that, right. I’d hit that.”

Holy shit. Help me Jesus.

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Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

My three highs

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I don’t smoke. But, I get the vibe of being in a state of chill and vibing off of a high.

I have three highs.

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My first high is sitting on a park bench feeling a spring wind blow on my face under the shade of a tall tree with thick leaves.

Nature. A time when I’m content in the present in enjoying life in the moment.

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My second high is like the first. I get it in a quiet space. In a setting where I am just listening for the story when I writing. I let my fingers go and I read where I left off in the sentence the other day and continue on.

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My third high is music. I vibe heavy to any type of music. My favorites are Prince, classical and everything else that isn’t modern rap.

I memorize songs in my head. My recal is near perfect. I vibe to it. It brings up my mood on a shity day or when I really need to focus on a really boring day.

I’m also a cheap bastard and paying for anything that smells like shit or is expensive as hell is not a high for me. It sounds like spending my money on some bullshit.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

My thoughts on Indiana Jones The Dial of destiny

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This is going to be an overview thought process on the two 2000s movies. I can’t give you a full review because fuck those movies. I barely got through crystal scowl. Fucking hell. They made two movies. Holy shit.

Here’s a sane review of the movie. These are my thoughts on the concept of the aging almost dead old man on another adventure.

Fuck Harrison Ford.

Really. I mean it from the bottom of my heart. I’ve lived long enough to be an old fuck to say it and not give a fuck. Fuck that drunk’n old bastard for even doing these godforshaken movies.

I don’t give a fuck if you love the old dirty bastard for what he did in the past. He killed Han Solo and he effectively killed Indiana Jones for some bullshit mid death fantasy cocain dream of being a young hero again. Fuck um.

Holy fucking shit my Dude. I feel for dude’s and gals that went to watch these movies because of some nostalgic phantom dream of when movies made sense.

Harrison Ford. Holy fucking shit. An 80 year old dirty bastard couldn’t let Indiana Jones ride into the sunset with his Pops to have another adventure and let that shit end.. no. This fucking dude had to be on the big screen one more time making an ass clown of himself just to prove how much of shit head head he really is.

Now. If you enjoyed the movie. Good. I’m glad somebody does. Honestly no bullshit. Somebody has to enjoy this shit for me not go insane pondering who the fuck these movies are for.

Harrison Ford’s time is done. It’s time for new hero for new age…

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Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Unwinnable wars: The Russian vs Ukraine (New World Order edition)

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Let’s really recap this shit show.

It’s been 9 years in the ongoing conflict in total. Two fucking years sense shit went hot and the Swedish government after 200 years of staying the fuck out of goble dumbass wars decided to through their fucking hat in to the mix of current unwinnable wars against Russia. Automatically dropping their bag and fucking up their position.

The leader of the NWO

The leader in the secret war against Russia is a ancient old dirty bastard democratic gangster. This is the face of the greatest military mind and social justice leader of the enslaved 1st world empires. This is the fucking king that the fucking empiral United States of America elected.

I stopped giving a fuck in part for nine months because I got shit to do. We’re in a recession but but we’re not in a recession but we’re in a recession. Nobody collectively can confirm or agree on a reality anymore let alone why the fuck I should care about a war that’s lasted way to fucking long to end without some major fuck up on the new world order front. CNN, FOXNEWS and Jim Bob at the corner liquor still all agree that the Ukraine is winning and Russia is the greatest evil on the face of this God forsaken world.

This the era of clown world reality.

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Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Gum Gum berry Jin & juice

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This shit has been on my damn mind for a week now…..the fucking gummi bears theme song to that fucking show.

Maybe it’s old age. Maybe it’s my black sense of humor as look back on the 90s with a side eye. I wonder. What the fuck was in that chocolate milk I drank on Saturday mornings.

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This shit is way back in the day before the devil mouse bought Star Wars and the descent in to fucking madness with the abominations of Indiana Jones 2020s horse shit movies…

One question invades my mind daily. How the fuck did they get away with a cartoon about a bunch of fucking bears in the woods getting drunk on some berry jin and juice.

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Fucking bouncing here and there and getting turned up enough to start bouncing on their asses to evade black people Orcs trying to get the secrets to the juice.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg