Tag: dark comedy

Ye’s apologies to his masters that have their feet on his neck…

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I didn’t really give a damn at first. But, seeing a billion or rich man be whipped to submission and put back in his submissive place of wealth without power to his masters.

Ye is a slave. You may like Ye. I don’t give a fuck. He is a mother fucking billionaire slave my dude. This is the comedy of days gone to the fucking doggs.

Photo by Frank K on Pexels.com

I got thoughts. Several thoughts. I learned something. No. I’m reminded of two things specifically I learned during the pandemic covid mask bullshit.

When you are a slave to your passions, your stuff and your ego, whatever you have a price your willing to pay and most importantly…

If you do believe in anything. I mean really believe in anything you are less inclined to sell your soul for fancy pants and a pair diamond laced sneakers.

I’m not saying don’t go after the bag or get your money or any of that bullshit. I’m asking you honestly do you want to be somebody’s bitch?

I get it. Some times you got to be depolomatic in life but the fucking dude got his ass handed to him for talking about Lord Voldermort??

Real talk. You can’t talk shit about em. You can’t say anything let alone speak the name that makes grown man piss themselves to sleep at night if it is whispered in their ear.

This shit is silly as fuck!

I can’t. I can’t handle this shit. This is reality?! Holy shit.

Mother fucka’s are having his paper and repetition fucked with because he was crying about the fucking the Lords and Lady’s of the fucking west owning his slave ass.

Now. I grew up around the Jewish community. You say jew I think someone who wear’s a black suit, pimp hat and wants to be left the fuck alone to be who they are talk Russian all damn day.

Ye and rest of the fucking world says jew. I think. Lord Voldermort. I grew up reading Harry Potter. The shit sound the fucking same.. The fuck?!

I think the world means the financial merchant technocrats. That’s obivous but no one gives a fuck about the sky being blue.. but all of it sounds like whinning to me from the lips of slaves with boots on their necks.

No. I don’t give a fuck he said some shit about the royalty that rule the fucking west. I don’t give a fuck and neither will anybody else when it’s two months from now if not two days.

It’s a lesson though. Do your own thing and don’t be beholden to anybody for how you get your bread or feed your damn kids.

I’m sorry. No. I’m not sorry. Ye got the shit test. People will say he kissed the ring because black people didn’t support him….

Bitch please.

If he wanted to be free he should have walked the fuck away and expected to lose it all so he could start over again. There are only two options 1. a boot on your neck or 2. bounce.

Ye will probably bounce back and get more wealth and fancy pants from all this. But, he’s still a slave. That’s just the way it is. Would I be any different though if I was given the choice?

I don’t know. I’m weird though. I don’t like the idea of being somebody’s bitch or people taking me for a sucka they can turn out. I would rather be left the fuck alone.

Conflict. It’s in the air we breathe and water we swim in. Personally, I prefer to vamp it and blow out sweet pain and free thinking.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

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A study in female bullshit 6. She wants to abort his baby because they can’t afford it?! Read to the end!

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Alright here’s the dude’s story ..

He’s smoking on his cigar doing a live stream on YouTube. He’s relating an event in his life when his wife was going to have a blood ritual sacrifice because they couldn’t afford the baby.

He’s a neo modern man. His wife is a cult worshiper and he respects her right to her religion and leadership in the home. So he can’t stop her. He would like to see his kid born so he tries to make logical arguments to her to convince her not to sacrifice his child in her body in the ritual.

She ain’t hearing the shit. She’s smoking cigars and going to do whatever the fuck you wants to do.

However, she hears an emotional story from a female co-worker at work about her regrets about sacrificing her baby in the cult ritual.

Dude’s wife changes her mind. She has the baby. Dude is happy to have his kid but still a bit sore that his logical arguments couldn’t change her mind….

Now do I think she’s an emotional  evil bitch. No. She is a godless pagan cult worshipper.

There is some details I left out for us to reexamine this story.

She had four kids before they met. Dude marries her still and the kids call him their father. He takes care of them like a true father to them. She was already a single mother. So was already struggling. She gets with the dude but apparently he wasn’t a high earner at the time.

She is a female. Think about it from her prospective. She already had got somebody to act as the father for her kids. They couldn’t afford another kid at the time. Her reasoning was sacrifice the kid to protect the resources for her current number of family members.

Now…dude is a modern man. He believes in the superior will of the female in the production of children for the family unit. He has no say in how much children they have. He can offer an opinion and advice but the female has the last and final say as the matriarch of the family.

Both of them are modern atheist black folks.

I have one question about this that has been swimming in my head.

“Why in the fuck would a dude think or even attempt to have children with a female that regards a dude’s opinions as mute when he is in fact her second choice in value to be her man?”

And….

Her kids are first importance. He is dead fucking last. She will validate another female more then her man’s opinion though. This is not a dig at them. This is modern day life. This is a lesson in female bullshit but as always….

To each his or her own bullshit.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

I feel it sometimes…that feeling like I’m living in one of the back stories of world war Z (the book) or world war dumbass

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Five years ago,  the fucking world was different. It wasn’t all happy dreams and rainbows but just five years ago I didn’t have to wear a mask permanently outside in unsafe asshole know it all zones. I didn’t have to hear a fucking  fear in a dude’s voice about covid. 

Mother fuckers honest to God trust men in lab jackets. Mother fuckers honest to God think the vaccines are safe because reasons? Mother fuckers honest to God trust the fucking government.

The last part is the scariest to me. Men in lab jackets lie. Men who sale the vaccines lie. The government? Does the United States Government tell lies?

People are acting like the words that come out of  Crept Keeper Joe’s mouth are the words of the Lord himself. 

Come man, trust the system?!

Holy shit!

But,  I never realized how much people are willing to delude themselves just not to be afraid but to feel safe. To pretend they don’t live in a state of fear.

Why? All this fear?

That’s what I hear some times in people’s voices. They know something is wrong. They don’t want to face it so they pretend everything is okay in their American Dream world.

Not everyone of course. I’m in Texas.

I live with depression on my back. So I do not stand on a high ground stance of bravory. I fight against my own person shit every day. I don’t have any delusions about myself. I fucked up my life more times then I can count.

Maybe, that’s it. I can’t lie about myself or what I see now. I know that this isn’t normal. This simulated world of 2021. 

Oh did you hear about the president of Hati being gun-down by DEA agents

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P.S. We have saying now. It’s called “Stay Safe” but safe from what covid? No. A better saying would be “Keep you finger on your safety because shits about to get real”

Here is an example of a delusional dumbass. (Comedy?!)

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I came into the house holding the door open for my dumbass sister. She came in without looking up or offering a thank you because she was watching a ticktok video on her Iphone and laughing. She had on tiny shorts a Tank top and no bra.

She walked past me to her room. I slammed the door. She paused and looked at me.

“What’s your deal?”

“I saw you cross the fucking street as I drove away after dropping you off at the mall. You went to the sacrifice temple again. That’s the seventh time this year alone. What the fuck do have against birth control or the bitch your fucking using a damn condom.”

Jenny paled but put her chin up. “I’m ninteen. It’s my body and my choice. You can’t tell me not to have a blood ritual sacrifice.”

“Fuck that bullshit. I told your ass to focus on getting a job not getting laid. You flunked out of college and your a fucking slut. You can’t even find a man with money to pay for your fucking phone bill. Fucking get a job and start paying for your own phone bill at least miss independent woman or I’m going to take your phone and car away.”

Jenny started crying.

“You have one week. Get a job or I’m taking back my Iphone and my car. Do I look like I’m bullshiting?” I asked her.

Jenny stopped crying and glared at me. “Alright. Alright you fucking asshole. I’ll get a fucking job. Damn it. All you men are the fucking same. Dominanting and controling.”

I held up a hand. “Save me the female bullshit for your pussy whipped muscular boy toy. Clocks ticking. Oh and you better keep the job for six months or say bye bye to your credit cards to bitch. You ain’t running shit around here. You’re living good because I pay for it and allow it. It’s time to grow up baby sister. Now come over here and give me and kiss.”

Jenny glared at me. “I fucking hate you.” She said and stomped over to hug my waist and kissed my cheek before stomping to her room.

“I love you Jenny.”

Jenny turned back and gave me the finger. “I love you to asshole.”

Fin.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P. S. You know the fucked up thing about this post. This is a real likely thing that happens in the 1st world shit holes.

GOP conservative hoes have become the snarky bitch that makes fun of cocain pimp democrats for selling…cocain American dreams? Part 2

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When did it become the game plan for GOP hoes to set off on a mission of making food of lying cocain pimp Democrats for being…lying cocain pimp Democrats.

I don’t get it.

Why the bullshit?

Most of the rise of T-Money and the fall of our Obama years was about conservative hoes being the new cool hoe that made fun of big daddy pimp cocain Democrats for being liars.

….

Yeah that’s it. No punch line. No the punch line I fell for the shit too…well not really. It was entertaining until the moments I realized most conservative hoes were snorting cocain dream lies themselves while making fun of democrats for just being real gangsters.

Real talk. I grew up around gangster democrats. I voted for a dude that had mob ties and two female mayors that were thieves that stole from poor people…

Did I know this at the time. Yes and no. I had vague knowledge about it but I didn’t care. I wasn’t snorting cocain. I was a dumbass kid and didn’t know shit about voting just every politician is gangster of some kind.

Some things didn’t changed.

I say all this to say GOP conservative hoes again conserve liberalism and snort some type of liberal cocain dream tradition.

You can trust the dude you know. The dude that will ride with you. The dude that will stand for something that is traditional.

You trust a card carrying conservative hoe with white fairy dust under his nose talking about blood ritual sacrifices being bad because the deta says it but we really need more wars in the middle of the godforsaken dessert because reasons?

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Who are the high little gods of the American Empire? (Comedy?)

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The high moral Lords and ladies of the dying American Empire are the defacto moral gods of the land. The little gods that invent law in the American Empire by reading tea leaves and preforming eisegesis on the consistution (ancient text) of the united states American Empire.

The two modes of scholarship these little gods partake are forms.

Exegesis – what does it say and what do the words used in text mean.

Eisegesis – This is what I think mean based on what I know from my own experiences and opinions about what the text says before my grand daddy was born.

Prime example. One of chief little gods on the Supreme court read into an old text a form universal health care in the form of a tax.

It was pure bullshit but sense he was appointed a little god of the Supreme Court it gave him the hubris and arrogence to enforce the shit on a dead document writen by people that are dead.

Pause.

Remember the rule. I’m writing about this because I saw it happened and laughed my asshole off. The shit is funny to me because I know the ending to this movie.

Rewind the clock back to a few decades back. Some court case about Row v Wade marks a major change in the rise of the worship of female choice and the peagon cult religion.

Same shit different time period. The short hand version of the shit is you have people reading into a dead document the intention of blood ritual sacrifices being a right for the a female cult worshipper at the time who later recanted on her bullshit but the deed was done the rest is a history of cult services and taglines about the worship of females being great.

Pause.

Holy shit. Why the fuck is this shit so funny to me? Another question I have to figure out.

Holy shit. I’ve heard atheists bitch and cry about pastors and cult leaders using people to get money and ass by reading into an ancient text what they want people to do.

The little gods of Supreme Court of the fucking land daily decide the moral and legal norms of the American Empire. They play the game of gods when they want to and then fake it like that isn’t what the fuck they’ve done and what the fuck they’re doing.

Honestly speaking how long do you think this shit can go on? Nothing lasts forever. Why? Eventually people get tired of the bullshit.

To my knowledge only one of these assholes had the courage to step down from the shit after a lifetime of fucking with the moral compass of the people for years and say…

You know. I’m done. I would to be a fucking human being for the short about of time I have to live before I die and go home to hell. – nobody said it. The dude called it – retirement.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

GOP conservative stable of hoes conserve one thing…Liberalism part 1?

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Real talk. Pimp cocain democrats took the fuck over the culture in the 70s up to the fall of our Obama. GOP hoes went along for the ride and adapted to the shit.

That’s why a traditional GOP hoe is a sellout and back bottom hoe to his core.

Why?

Conservative – To take a strong stance or posture and to conserve traditions and all that bullshit.

What the fuck happens when the culture and it’s traditions are dick addicted Masturbation parades,(no I’m not talking about pride marches) blood ritual sacrifice celebrations and support your local asshole to the senate?

Several conservative hoes in the Supreme Court house that are all card carrying cult worshippering blood ritual sacrifice hoes.

Now….this is the end of part 1.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

Ariana grande? So many questions.

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Why? Is she famous?

Real talk. She’s okay looks wise. Keep in mind I’m a fan of shorties her size and height but na’aw. Something about her just puts me off.

I can remember seeing her on a children’s show called Sam & Cat and thinking is this a closet lesbian tv show on the low.

I’m not saying that’s what the show is it’s just the feel of the show. The undertones. She played a dumb bitch and acted with a fake high voice and had this spaced out high look on her face most of the time. She played a dumbass real good my dude. Still had that weird lesbian vibe to it in the interactions with the other female lead character.

The show ended quickly enough and no sooner had it ended then she was on a fucking stage singing some bullshit pop song.

Flash forward to a dozen or so slut pop songs and I remember this bitch again when she’s singing at Aretha Franklin’s funeral.

She’s singing some song and Bill Clinton is staring at her like she’s a hocker for sale with a bag of cocain included and I’m looking at her not in lust but wondering….

Why the fuck does she look so stupid singing? Real talk. I’m looking at her sing decent enough but why does she look a little off. Her eyes are closed on parts of the song and she’s moving her head and body around weirdly. Not to the flow of the music or feeling but like she can’t control herself properly. I can’t tell if she’s high or just young and dumb. Why can’t she keep the fuck still. What the fuck is she wearing? It’s look like her handler dressed her to find a new sugar Daddy to pay for a goble war tour.

When the fuck is this bitch going to grow up? I’m thinking. But, she is grown. Right? In her twenties.

Still though. The only reason I thought about the bitch is because of question. How many puppets for the machine are their? Crept Keep Joe is one for sure but then I thought about the puppet like qualities of Ariana Grande.

Look all this is my opinion of course and maybe wrong in regards to Grande being a tool for the machine. Joe Biden is a given that bitch sold his soul before my Momma was born.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P.S. Why the fuck do people worship and lust after these people?

Fifty years a femininst experiment on western men and we are the result…let’s talk about it.

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I am product of pussfied methods meant to put me in line and keep me from being what I naturally am…

A man.

Holy shit. You know I was going somewhere serious about this but fuck that noise. The whole subject is too funny to me for some reason.

I mean come on my dude. Even with every effort feminists made to pussfying the men of the west it amounts as a whole proving to be one giant fuck up that’s coming apart as we speak.

Real talk my dude. I’m thinking back to the 80s my dude. That one decade that was the last big bang for masculine energy that is still felt today. I mean I didn’t even grow up in the 80s but I still hear the echoes of it in my head.

A man must be a bad ass. No question and without a doubt.

Society is against the notion of a man being a bad ass. That means being a badass is the way to go because what’s more bad ass then being against the boring pussfied grain of society.

I mean pushing against a society trying to go against man’s nature to be a bad ass was cool back in my day now it’s Base. The more things change the more Big Dick energy is a requirment from a boy’s graduation from simp to Bad Ass.

I mean society wants men to give leadership over to females. Not partnership. Leadership. Why? Because big dick energy causes wars and all that bullshit. Because to be a man means to comprise on what you believe or to have no values other then money and sex???

Pause.

Hmmm. Money and sex. Resources and feelings. Tits and Ass. Female and street walker.

To be a man in modern society means to think like a hocker out for fun and a transaction. The bullshit. The pussfied western society romantic bullshit.

Anyway.

The same reason my dear sweet black power princess mother didn’t want me to a water gun when I was nine. Society at large wants to pussfy males into being weak helpless pussfied beta bitch males.

The shit doesn’t work and the shit ain’t normal.

Tell me. What is more cool, then rebeling against a pussfied society and making a femininst head explode by telling her and society to their collective faces….

“No women don’t make good leaders. They think with their feelings. If I did get married at all I’m old school. I’d would be the leader of my house and the bread winner. What’s that smell? Miss? There is smoke coming from your ears.”

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P. S.

To be a man doesn’t mean you love violence. It means you embrace your god given legacy to be a dominant Big Dick, Conflicting Vaping BAD ASS MOTHER FUCKER!!

Does white Supremacy exist? Yes it exists and no it’s not T-money saying weird shit.

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This is going to funny to me at least. Look my dude. My skin folk kick up a lot of dust about the shit and point in many directs at it but often times fail to point at the devil behind the green curtain.

The more things change the more they stay the same remember that.

Example. Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence did a movie together called LIFE. Great movie that packed a whole lot of comedy in a horror movie.

Two dudes get set up and go to jail for life. In jail at this time period the warden has jailors who act as his henchmen in jail to keep the other Blacks in line. That’s right the Warden gets other prisoners or Blacks to keep the other Blacks enslaved.

Hmmm. I bring this up to say one thing it’s not about hate altogether it’s about capitalizing off of groups of people for money. Now a smart business man or woman that happens to be white and wants to capitalize on Blacks buying or voting habits will not say it. They will not even reveal themselves in public about their motives. Why do it. That would only stop their purpose. It would be best to hire low moral Blacks that are money driven that can best do their wishes.

What would their wishes be? Well to make money in general and to keep a proticular group in line. Maybe even making fun and degrading blacks to simple idiots can be effective in growing your stock portfolio.

Now capitalism isn’t evil or racist on it’s own. Some times using racism as a means of feeding your family can be justified to people. Real talk. Some of these people don’t see a damn thing wrong with fucking with the Brand of an entire group of people. They might even think their justifying it by giving blacks a voice to just be who they think Blacks should be.

Clowns. Money hungry. Sexual deviants. Criminals. You make all these images pretty if you call it comedy.

You see real white Supremacy is a bullshit way of saying alright how can I make these Blacks stupid enough to keep voting for this bitch. I know I’ll get some funny Black to simp for her and get the others to fall in line.

Just an opinion of mean. You know Martin Lawrence made three Big Momma movies. Did you think it was funny seeing him running around as an old Negro Big Momma. Was it funny seeing the actor who played his son dress up like a clown. He made bank with those movies. He took a lot pride in the money he made for himself and white folks of course.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P. S. It should go without saying that I’m not talking about the shit kickers, the lone star cowboys and the like. If a God fearing lone Star cowboy heard this shit don’t you think he would be wandering….have these big city rich sum bitches done this shit to my kin and my goodboddy Leroy too? The answer is you bet your country fried ass my dude.

Kwame Brown? The strange case of a man responding back to rich celebrity assholes that fuck with him for no reason out of nowhere.

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Look the shit. I’m going to summarize.

Ex-nba dude KB gets thrown shade by celebrity ex-nba dudes on tv about his career.

KB responds back. Ex-nba dudes shit themselves and call him an angry black rambo.

Some dude on a radio show throws his hat in the conversation because reasons. He tries to “defend” KB by calling him an angry Black dude from an angry black family.

KB respond back to Radio show host by exposing Radio Show host’s past habit of doing the dirty maybe, possible with a 15 year old girl. Though there was a court case and he got off.

Anyway, the shit keeps getting deeper and deeper. Because, once again all the shit started because assholes keep fucking with KB and he just responds back.

The easiest solution is the assholes to apologize right???

Radio show host apologies. But, you know it’s one of those pet on the head apologies.

Example

“Listen dude. I was having a laugh at your family and your people and pissing on your charecter and I’m sorry you became an angry black dude about it. I’m really sorry and your a good dude. A really good dude. Sorry. We good now right?

I find the shit amazing. It’s a study in bullshit reasoning, magic nonsense logic and rich assholes trying to shit on a dude with BIG DICK ENERGY that isn’t having it.

Warm Regards

Guardiandogg

P.S.

Dude is young enough to be my son. I am an old fuck.

Update: He’s older then me. I am a dumbass.