Category: fun

Hot damn! What a time to be alive thriftbooks.com is the shit. (Book nerd shit)

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Holy shit.

I’m getting up and getting ready for work my dude. Checking my email and looking through the fucking adds on my email account box.

Pause.

I got a love and fucking hate for adds in general on websites and email boxes. It fucking messes up the flow of the box and distracts you from looking up your shit.

However, I am book nerd as I say in the title and occasionally an add telling you about a sale on your favorite website can be helpful. I think of adds as helping you in a direction to buy what you want and when you want to buy it at best.

Case and point. I get a email from fucking amazon about some books I might be interested in.

Pause.

Amazon. Holy shit. I got a love and fucking take this bitch to the back of the barn and put this bitch down feeling about it. For a book nerd it’s a fucking gold mine of finding books and for a book nerd it’s a fucking bitch asshole with the rediculas unreasonable prices. A hundred dollars for a paperback that came out in 2013. Get the fuck out of here my dude.

In a post literally era that shit better be premium leather with a signature from Robert Frost on the back of it my dude. I’d pay top mother fucking dollar then. A paperback, not now or ever is worth a hundred dollars baring Robert Frost’s spit on it.

I come back to my point. I was in my email looking at an email from amazon for an author I was peeping at a few weeks ago. He had some titles that looked interesting. I clicked on and found one title that read like a fun ride. A noir action and adventure fantasy in a nineteen 30s new york type feel my dude. I like it. I rock that shit.

But it was a trilogy. I’m half and half on trilogies. The first better be the shit. I don’t like to get invested in a bullshit story from the jump with a bullshiting ending. Still I’m interested enough so I clicked on to the remaining books in the series. I stared at the prices.

Holy shit! A hundred dollars a piece!? Fuck out of here. I copy and past the author’s name unto Thriftbooks.com.

I find all that shit for under a hundred dollars. That’s what’s up my dude. I rock with that shit. I found this site a year ago and I’m going to buying from it more now my dude. Prices are decent. Collection of books is modest but great titles.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

High level bullshit: Politics from an American  Highlander’s prospective

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Politics in general is a bullshit game of those that do the fucking and those that get fucked from behind a table.

American politics for those not in the know is a bullshit game of illusion and deception. To the general public you have the deception of Democrats vs Republicans. The defenders of the poor and the evil big business assholes. There are clear binary lines. Between my team and your team.

Holy fucking shit!

Think about that shit. Has life ever been that fucking simple. Holy fucking shit.

Mother fucker it’s more like cocain pimp Democrats and their stable of loyal hoes vs the sucker they trying to hit up for capitalist transaction. Cocain Democrats keep their street agents in line and The stable of hoes make you believe you have a really big dick and they really hate their pimp and are trying to leave him and they really love you.

The rest are suckers or johns. Holy shit. There is more of a conflict/contrast between the crepts and the bloods fighting over a damn street corner my dude.

Contrasts

Grand Master pimp cocain Nacy Pelosia career politican. She has a masters in female bullshit and doctorate in the grifting game. Hey, no hate on my end. Look at her record my dude. She get her shit done and is a wealthy world class master of the political bullshit game my dude. Look her shit up that bitch will put Al Capone to shame.

Older then fucking Noah with power and money and still holding down a marriage for thirty plus years. Bitches need to take notes. A fucking old dirty OG.

Big T that dude is a fucking legend. He came into the bullshit game of politics simply by name alone and getting in when the Pimp cocain Democrats were counting their money and the stable of GOP hoes were taking a shit.

Big T revealed all that bullshit in the bullshit game of politics to the world and the suckers and Johns looked to the cocain pimps and stable of hoes GOP to find out if it was true.

Holy shit! Shorty said she loved me. She wouldn’t lie to me.

Get the fuck out here you damn simp.

You know the story. I’m a fucking highlander so I’ve seen it before. I’ll see it again. Still waiting for the punch line though. Everything is just to damn calm for me. I can taste conflict and fight in the air.

Hot damn! What a time to be alive.

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg

I ain’t a Black Rambo. I’m a mother fucking Highlander. A prince of the mother fucking universe

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Real talk my guy

I was born in the hills of east Baltimore. The son of a Black Rambo nomad badass. My mother a black power princess daughter of a cocain high Lord Democrat.

I grew up in between the highlands of Baltimore my father’s lands and the low lands of North Carolina my mother’s land. I spent the remainder of my first half of my life in the highlands studying to be a bard and picking up skills here and there.

Right around sixteen my dude I hit the quickening. No joke my dude. Fire and ice hit my body for a moment and I pasted out with a collection of Robert Frost poetry in my hand. I stopped fucking aging at sixteen years old. Same age my mother gave me my first sword.

I didn’t notice this shit because I had my head in a book and was trying to be a poet like my hero Robert Frost. My dream was to be a bard/scholar on his level at least. That’s my dude. I rock with his shit hard in my younger years.

Anyway, fast forward a couple of years. It finally hit me when I have fucking twenty year olds thinking I was around their age or younger added on to that I was at my gym (job) yesterday and I realized I had gotten fucking stronger from two years ago.

Holy shit. The quickening hit then and there. The power went out in the building and I had young dudes looking at me weird because lightening bolts were flashing out of my guns my dude. Holy shit! I can’t live in denial for fifty more years.

I’m a highlander my dude. A prince of the mother fucking universe.

My story continues….

Warm Regards,

Guardiandogg